Tuesday, March 13, 2007

Loving Difficult People- Understanding and Helping Difficult Personalities

Loving Difficult People- Understanding and Helping Difficult Personalities
Illustration: Frogs can consume anything that bugs them!Wouldn’t it be great if we could consume our relational problems rather than letting them consume us! What bugs you the most about people? Is it inconsistency? Inflexibility? Inability to give and take? or people with bad attitudes? Some people suffer from guilt in their relationships.
Rom. 12: 18. “if possible so far as it depends upon you, be at peace with all men.”
Do the best you can to get along with everyone.Yet realize that once a while you are going to have relationship with a difficult person that may fall short of the ideal.A personal inventory of the 3P’s will help you determine your part in a difficult relationship or association.
1. Perspective. How do I see myself? How do I see others? How do others see me? Our perspective determines how far our relatonships will develop.2. Process. Do I understand the stages of a relationship? Do I realize there are some stages in a relationship that are more crucial than others?3. Problems. When facing difficulties in a relationship, how do I handle them?
A person who sees himself positively also looks for the good in others. It’s all in one’s perspective.Some people see a relationship as a series of isolated incidents, and one bad incident can break the relationship. People who think this way never develop deep relationships. Their relationships are precarious, on-again-off again type of associations. These people run everytime a difficult situation arises. They seldom, if ever, develop long-standing relationships.The key to successful relationships really gets down to responsibility. I am responsible for how I treat others, I may not be responsible for how they treat me; but I am responsible for my reaction to those who are difficult. I can’t chose how you’ll treat me, but I can choose how I willl respond to you.
There are certain general rules which you can put into practice that will enable you to work more effectively with problem people.
1. Love them unconditionally.2. Ask God for wisdom in working with them.3. Stay emotionally healthy yourself.4. Do not elevate people (to positions of leadership) in order to rescue them.5. Be honest with God, yourself, and them.
Be Encouraged.
* 3rd All India Youth Festival in Mumbai. See the details at http://ctouch.org/youthfest3.htm
* A lot of Useful Resources for Victorious living: www.ctouch.org